NWS Predicts Bizarrely Aggressive Snowstorms, Recommends Locking Car Doors

DISCLAIMER: This is not an actual forecast from the National Weather Service. This is intended for entertainment purposes only.

The National Weather Service forecast for tomorrow is expected to be less severe than Monday’s forecast.

This will likely be the second straight day that the snow-covered area has been without rain.

A snowfall of 1 to 2 inches is possible in the mountains from 7 AM to 9 PM.

The National Weather Service has been tracking a high of 5 inches, which is in the 6 to 9 inches range. If it is still raining that is a 5 in the 12 to 14 in range.

If you go down to the airport, expect to have to wait an hour or so to board a flight.

There has been some damage in the area, but it won’t be too bad.

The National Weather Service forecast for tomorrow also predicts a snowstorm warning for the mountains.

Stay safe.

Stay in the car if you want to be safe. And, please be careful with powerlines.

There is no power to the area, and you have to stay on high ground to avoid power lines.

The National Weather Service has issued the following warnings for today:

Stay inside and keep clear.

If the winds are blowing heavy, it is important to stay inside or take cover.

Do not get out in the snow.

Stay inside if possible, but do not venture up onto the roof. It will be very windy.

If you get stuck near a power line, call for assistance and keep moving until it becomes clear.

Be sure not to climb over the powerline. It will be very difficult to free yourself.

Stay on a snowmobile or a walking snowboard or snowmobile tandem if possible.

Get ready for the weather

The National Weather Service says that there should be some showers overnight.

Be patient and stay off of the road.

Stay away from trees.

If you find yourself in a snowstorm, make sure you are wearing appropriate clothing.

Stay inside for the most part, but it is not recommended to walk in the snow. If you want to get into it, stay inside in the car with the doors locked.

Be careful not to get stuck in a snowstorm.

Stay safe, and stay safe.

Related posts

Grandma’s Amazing Lasagna Recipe

My grandmother’s recipe for lasagna is as amazing as her recipe for lasagna. So great. It is so much easier when you make lasagna from scratch.

In all, I’ve made this lasagna for the last week. I’ve made the lasagna with a batch of the lasagnes, followed by lasagna for lunch. This is my lasagna for dinner, followed by lasagna for weekend lunches!

I love making lasagna the way it is because the only thing I have to worry about is that my kids will eat it in the microwave (I hate microwave meals – I don’t like them!). It’s easy to put together and can be prepared in about 15 to 20 minutes. It will also turn out great for a party.

It’s time to make your lasagna. Start by cooking all the ingredients in a pot on low heat for about 2 minutes until they’re all cooked through. It’s important to let it cool down so all that delicious lasagna goodness that’s in that pot goes back into the oven and is ready to eat!

You’ll notice that after you’ve made the lasagna, I’m still cooking pasta from scratch. I used to make pasta and pasta only, but the other day when I made some pasta out of the same recipe for lasagna lasagna, I realized I didn’t have enough pasta in my fridge. I used to have about 2 cups of pasta left in the fridge when my kids used it.

So here are the pasta ingredients in a bowl:

2 cups of chicken stock (I like to use regular chicken stock. My grandmother made her own by cooking it at the pot over medium heat and letting it sit for a few months. I like it because it is thick and delicious!)

1/3 cup of Parmesan cheese

1/3 cup of freshly grated parmesan

1/4 cup of Parmesan cheese

6 ounces of heavy cream

2 tablespoons of fresh oregano

1/4 cup of chopped fresh chives

1/4 cup of shredded cheddar cheese

6 ounces of shredded cheddar cheese

2 tablespoons of fresh parsley

3 cloves garlic

Salt and Pepper

1 tablespoon olive oil

Freshly ground black pepper

I used a 3/4 cup measuring cup to make this lasagna, but a 2/3 cup measuring cup works just as well. You can also substitute any other type of lasagna or pasta you’d prefer for this, but I just used chicken and Parmesan for this lasagna recipe.

The first step to making this lasagna is to make the pasta.

Place all the ingredients in the bowl of a food processor and process until smooth. I like to use my hand for this step, but I also like a food processor that comes with me with a food processor attachment. It’s easier to use your fingers, but you can also use an immersion blender.

I use my food processor attachment, but you can also use your hands if you are nervous about using your hands!

You want the pasta to be very coarse. You want it slightly softer in the center of the bowl. Make sure the pasta is very soft and that each piece of the pasta has a distinct texture.

The next step is to combine the pasta and the chicken stock.

This may take around 2 minutes, however, if you are nervous, do it quickly after you have processed your food processor to make sure you do a good job. I usually like to use my hands while mixing this mixture, but if you’re nervous, you can use a food processor. You’re going to be mixing it, I promise!

The next step is to combine the Parmesan and the chives in a small food processor.

If you aren’t careful when you combine it, you will end up with very small pieces of chopped garlic and a very bitter taste in your mouth.

It’s important to make sure the chives and the garlic are not mixed in too many, but you can do this by hand with a small spoon or your finger if you are too nervous. Make sure you keep doing this until the Parmesan mixture is smooth to the touch and no longer bitter, then add the garlic and chopped chives and process for another 2 or 3 minutes. Do not over mix! Just a few minutes will do you good!

Now, add your stock.

After you add the olive oil, you want to let the stock sit for about a minute while you process the pasta and chicken stock.

Then add the pasta and the chicken stock and process for another 3 minutes or so so the pasta is almost smooth.

After you add the pasta and the chicken stock and process for a couple more minutes, then add the Parmesan.

You should be done with all the ingredients by now!

I love this lasagna.

Related posts

Ominous Tornados Forecast for Tomorrow

DISCLAIMER: This is not an actual forecast from the National Weather Service. This is intended for entertainment purposes only.

The National Weather Service forecast for tomorrow is for winds from the southeast at 35 to 40 miles per hour, with wind shear at 5 miles per hour. The severe weather warning has been extended, with heavy rain likely in the afternoon. Highs and lows will be on the morning of Tuesday, October 19.

In a similar vein, a statement issued Wednesday afternoon issued a more detailed and ominous forecast for the next few days, noting, “We are seeing many tornadoes as they grow to the size of small cars and tornadoes in the area can become large tornadoes. We believe that all tornadoes should be reported in the order in which you think they will appear, and if we are correct it will not be until later tonight. The best chance of survival for many is to get down to someplace and go home. The risk is to be found where there are no roads but a small creek and a couple of old barns with no exits but some wooden shelter. If you cannot find a safe place, seek out a few places to hide.”

By this point of the week, some of the most dangerous tornadoes have already struck Southern California, a region which has experienced a spate of tornadoes each year for the last two decades.

On Wednesday afternoon, the National Weather Service in Riverside warned that at least 10 tornadoes have already damaged homes, and more are likely to hit in the coming days, including a twister which touched down at Lake Tahoe on Wednesday afternoon, the Weather Service said. A wind gust of up to 75 mph was recorded on Wednesday afternoon.

“The tornado was just a couple of feet away from one of our buildings and hit with no warning,” said Mike Schubert, a construction worker and resident of a home on a cul-de-sac on South Main Street, which was destroyed in the storm. “I saw a big white tornado coming right at me as it came through. … I was really scared, so I ran up the hill. I couldn’t get out of my house.”

Schubert, who lives across the street from the home where the twister struck, said he was on his way to work when he was knocked over from below. His neighbors told him a tornado touched down, and he went outside, hoping to avoid a potential tornado, as well.

“I saw it coming, and I was like what the hell?” said Schubert. “I didn’t know what to do. I was in shock. … I saw a big black cloud, and as it moved over my house, I heard that my neighbor was gone. Then there was a huge explosion.”

Schubert said he ran to a neighbor’s house to try to save his home, but he was too late: The house, which he had just built, had been destroyed.

“I was really scared, so I ran out to get my truck,” he said. “The house shook like it was on fire, but it was nothing like that.”  A few hours later, he said, “I thought for sure that my house was going to fall down and I wasn’t going to make it.”

Schubert said the tornado hit his neighborhood at the same time as several other tornadoes, which the weather service said may have been triggered by weather-related conditions.

The most severe tornado in the area was a 1-mile-wide tornado that struck Riverside County’s town of Lake Tahoe in a span of about 30 minutes on Wednesday afternoon, according to the National Weather Service.

“I’m shocked they couldn’t get to the scene sooner,” neighbor and Lake Tahoe resident Kevin Smith said. “There was a tornado just over our house. There’s not a lot of power in the area.”

Another neighbor, who only wanted to be identified as Tom, said, “I think everyone was scared out of their wits. We thought this would be a real tornado.”

He said the tornado was so strong it shook his family’s home, but, “We didn’t know what was going on. We weren’t ready. I just knew it had to be a tornado.”

A witness who saw the tornado described it as a “big, black cloud with no wind.” The tornado touched down about 50 yards from the home of Thomas Pyle, a construction worker and employee of the county, which was in flames, according to Schubert.

“He said it was a tornado,” said Schubert, pointing to a nearby home where a house that Pyle lives on collapsed.

The storm also injured three other people, who were treated at Riverside Medical Center, and one of them was flown by helicopter to the National Weather Service’s Sacramento headquarters for emergency management.

“The injuries were pretty bad,” Dr. Paul H. Miller, an emergency medical technician and a member of the National Weather Service’s weather division, said. “They were all pretty serious.”

He said he could not confirm any of the victims had died as a result of their injuries.

On Wednesday night, Riverside Fire Department Chief Steve Smith said the area where the tornado hit was “very heavily affected” and said that it would take up to 30 to 45 minutes for water to clear. Fire crews were working in the area to restore power to about 100 homes. “I’m very worried about the damage to the structures there,” Smith said. “If it had been a bigger storm, I don’t see that it would’ve been any different.”

Related posts

The Lord of War’s Voice

The Final Version

An unspeakable horror from another dimension stepped out of the portal, wisps of gas rising from the pavement where it made contact.  It was late and the street was mostly empty, a solitary man stood nearby at a bus stop, the only witness to what had happened.

A figure stood amidst the growing layer of fog just above the pavement, wearing dark, ragged clothes. Stretched across his face was a thin sheet of gray skin, covered in blood and grubs. His eyes were closed, and he was staring off into space. He spoke in a monotone, but a faint echo could be heard in the quiet surroundings.

A chill ran down the man’s spine. “What are you?”  As if in response to his question, the figure spoke.

“Your presence here. You will soon be gone. It is for the best.”

The air around the figure’s mouth and nostrils shifted, becoming slightly thicker. He spoke, “You will now be free to go wherever you wish, but I wish you would not go alone. My name is The Lord of War’s Voice. I am here to guide you. Your freedom comes with a price.”

“I’m just being a friend. I’m here just as I am right now. I know the Lord of War’s Voice will help you. I only asked you to help me, so you can free others.”

The Lord of War’s Voice laughed in the face of the man’s question. He spoke, “You will have to learn to accept it when it becomes apparent that you must do what is needed.”

“I’m…sorry, sir…I can’t…I don’t understand what I’m doing…” The man began walking away.

“I am here for those who have fallen, for the ones who need us most. The Lord of War’s Voice will help those he deems worthy to receive help. It is for those that need us most and have not yet found a voice.”

“But…I don’t have…a voice.” The man said, tears in his eyes as his thoughts turned into a fog.

“You will. You will be free. I will guide you to the place where you can find your voice. There will be many voices, many ways to speak, and the Lord of War’s Voice will guide you to the right one.”

“But…I…” The man began to fall and a growing light came from the portal.

“You will. You will find your voice. You have already found your voice.” The Lord of War’s Voice said, as his eyes closed again, “I have a name for you. A name, for the man you may be.”

The man began to walk towards the light, and the Lord of War’s Voice spoke to him again, “The man has been identified as the Lord of War’s Voice. You are free to return. I will guide you as you choose.”

He began to walk towards the light once more, only to be halted.

“You do not have a voice,” the Lord of War said, with his head lowered, “You have a mind that cannot comprehend a sound.”

A coldness descended upon the man’s body as he stared at the Lord of War’s voice. He turned, his eyes widening in shock.

The Lord of War’s Voice smiled, and the figure that had been standing in the shadows began to walk away.

The Lord of War looked at the man, who had just vanished from the shadow, and saw that he had become a new being. He was a being of pure white hair. As he was about to speak, he was interrupted by the Lord of War’s Voice, speaking in a low and deep voice.

“You were not here before. This is the first time I have heard your voice.” The Lord of War spoke, in a calm voice. “I am here to guide you, and to guide you, and to guide you, and to guide you. I am here to guide you. You will be guided to your own voice.”

Thoughts

I was impressed with the quality of this story, and the use of “The Lord of War’s Voice” as a name implies a fairly rich backstory in the universe this takes place. With that name, it was easy to ignore some of the awkward wording and take some of the word choices as threatening instead of out of place. I’ve also realized that I should probably start with a photo next time, as working backwards was a bit more of a challenge than I thought.

The Original Prompt

An unspeakable horror from another dimension stepped out of the portal, wisps of gas rising from the pavement where it made contact.

Unmodified Output

An unspeakable horror from another dimension stepped out of the portal, wisps of gas rising from the pavement where it made contact.

A figure stood amidst the clouds, wearing dark, ragged clothes. The mask was a thin sheet of gray skin stretched across his face, covered in blood and grubs. His eyes were closed, and he was staring off into space. He spoke in a monotone, but a faint echo could be heard in the quiet surroundings.

“What are you?”

A chill ran down the man’s spine. As if in response to his question, the figure spoke.

“Your presence here. You will soon be gone. It is for the best.”

The air around the figure’s mouth and nostrils shifted, becoming slightly thicker. He spoke, “You will now be free to go wherever you wish, but I wish you would not go alone. My name is The Lord of War’s Voice. I am here to guide you. Your freedom comes with a price.”

“I’m just being a friend. I’m here just as I am right now. I know the Lord of War’s voice will help you. I only asked you to help me, so you can free others.”

The Lord of War’s Voice laughed in the face of the man’s question. He spoke, “You will have to learn to accept it when it becomes apparent that you must do what is needed.”

“I’m…sorry, sir…I can’t…I don’t understand what I’m doing…” The man began walking away.

“I am here for those who have fallen, for the ones who need us most. The Lord of War’s Voice will help those he deems worthy to receive help. It is for those that need us most and have not yet found a voice.”

“But…I don’t have…a voice.” The man said, tears in his eyes as his thoughts turned into a fog.

“You will. You will be free. I will guide you to the place where you can find your voice. There will be many voices, many ways to speak, and the Lord of War’s Voice will guide you to the right one.”

“But…I…” The man began to fall.

“You will. You will find your voice. You have already found your voice.” The Lord of War’s Voice said, as his eyes closed again, “I have a name for you. A name, for the man you may be.”

The man began to walk towards the light, and the Lord of War’s Voice spoke to him again, “The man has been identified as the Lord of War’s Voice. You are free to return. I will guide you as you choose.”

He began to walk towards the light once more, only to be halted.

“You do not have a voice,” the Lord of War said, with his head lowered, “You have a mind that cannot comprehend a sound.”

A coldness descended upon the man’s body as he stared at the Lord of War’s voice. He turned, his eyes widening in shock.

The Lord of War’s Voice smiled, and the figure that had been standing in the shadows began to walk away.

The Lord of War looked at the man, who had just vanished from the shadow, and saw that he had become a new being. He was a being of pure white hair. As he was about to speak, he was interrupted by the Lord of War’s voice, speaking in a low and deep voice.

“You were not here before. This is the first time I have heard your voice.” The Lord of War spoke, in a calm voice. “I am here to guide you, and to guide you, and to guide you, and to guide you. I am here to guide you. You will be guided to your own voice.”

Related posts